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The types of things teenagers spend their time worrying about can seem like small potatoes compared to real-world, adult issues. But, adolescent years are very important years filled with change and development, as young adults begin to figure out who they are and what is important to them. While many teens process these difficult, identity-forming changes by pulling away from their parents, it’s important to stay connected with your teen and be there when they turn to you for support. Peer pressure and media-delivered messages can be powerful and persuasive to young adults. It’s normal for teens to want to spend more time with their friends, but research shows that when parents offer an open, supportive environment at home, kids are more likely to make the right choices on their own.

Even though it may not always seem like it, your teen does want to feel connected to you. Here are some steps parents can take toward keeping the lines of communication open and creating an encouraging parent-child relationship.

Listen Up

Teenagers often complain that their parents don’t really listen to them. It’s important to them that parents are interested in what they have to say. Show your child that you are paying attention when they decide to share with you by asking questions, or discussing topics that interest them.

Time Together

Even though they want to run off with their friends at any free moment, it’s important to still do things together as a family. Movie night or shopping trips are classic examples, or you can get creative by participating in an organized activity, class or workshop. Family dinners are an important and easy time to sit down together too.

A Little Help From Friends

Since teens want to be everywhere with their friends, it’s important to integrate their friends into certain activities. Knowing about their friends also shows that you listen and care who your child spends his or her time with. It’s a good idea to know the friend’s parents too, so you know what kind of environment your child will be in when they are with their friends.

Great Expectations and Goals

While it may not always seem like it, teenagers still turn to parents for praise and encouragement. They want to make you proud, so talking about your expectations and values teaches kids how to make better, more informed choices. Setting long-term goals is also a great way for kids to start taking responsibility for their own actions and future. Young adults who have plans to go to college or enter a specific career typically make smarter choices.

Be Open

It’s important to not only be open when it comes to communication, but also to be open to your child’s individuality. When kids feel that they are supported for who they are, they often find it easier to discuss difficult topics with their parents, getting the guidance they need to discover their own identity and easing the transition into adulthood.

Source: Allen, Kim, “What Can Parents Do To Keep Connection With Their Teens?” www.missourifamilies.org.